Oberlin, Boulders, And Bakeries

Oberlin College and Controversy Logo

The Oberlin College Series

Oberlin College boulder memorializing David Gibson
Oberlin College boulder memorializing David Gibson. Photo credit: JD Nobody.

Boulders rain on Oberlin only to reign later

Once upon a time, in the 1890s, Oberlin College had a Board of Trustees that was not bloated with ethically challenged people. The tiny and lean Administration contained no similarly challenged intellectually depraved sycophants or sociopaths. In this idyllic and ethical environment, some students publicly demonstrated that they were the most macho guys in all of Oberlin. They dug up a giant ice age granite boulder and moved it about a half-mile to the center of the campus to prove this. This midnight project was designed to conceal the perpetrator’s identity and to surprise everyone in the morning.

Gibson's Bakery (Oberlin) Horse Drawn Delivery Wagon c. 1905.
Gibson’s Bakery (Oberlin) Horse Drawn Delivery Wagon c. 1905. Gibson’s existed for 16 years before the Ford Motor Company was founded. Photo credit: Gibson’s Bakery.

The College Administration did not appreciate the boulder stunt, but they were not sure who did it. The boulder remained a campus eyesore since removing it was a more significant task than the College chose to undertake. Worse yet, the macho guys had not counted on there being more groups of macho guys who would dig up and move more boulders to the campus. One of the new stones was placed across the street from Gibson’s Bakery.

None of the macho men stole any refreshments from Gibson’s as a reward for their efforts. They saw boulder moving as an excellent prank but would have regarded stealing from the Gibson’s as disgusting.

A boulder silently reigns in Oberlin

In those days of yore, the College administration decided that the best way to deal with the macho men was to place a small bronze plaque on each boulder to commemorate the boulders’ arrival on campus. The great monoliths remained there as lonely sentinels until 1962, when students commenced midnight boulder stunts anew. The latest trick was not moving the pesky stones but regularly painting protest messages on them. Secret nighttime boulder painting became a tradition practiced to this day.

Oberlin College boulder memorializing David Gibson
Oberlin College boulder memorializing David Gibson. Baseball cap added. JD Nobody.

In December 2019, a new boulder paint job appeared on the boulder in front of Gibson’s Bakery. Its inscription reads, “We will miss U David [Gibson]”. Not eloquent, but yet it is.

No one seems to know who painted the “Gibson Rock.” There must be many in the town and College rejoicing at seeing a College boulder on College property proudly rubbing the College’s nose in the current slander job done on the Gibson’s. In a sense, the unmovable monolith in front of Gibson’s is a silent sentinel protecting them from further abuse by the College. That could be too much to hope for if the BOT is under the control of sociopaths.

It appears, based on a growing body of evidence, that the number one sin that allowed the Gibson mess to happen is laziness! Badly choked communication channels between the BOT and the Administration and the increasing likelihood that the BOT has been extensively lied to explain a lot.

“We believe that one person can change the world,” or so says Oberlin College. JD Nobody has taken on a more significant task: awakening the pathetically un-woke Oberlin College BOT to what they have negligently done to themselves, my college, its alumni, and the city of Oberlin. Changing the world would be easier than awakening Oberlin’s ossified BOT.

Perhaps programmable bots should replace the BOT and run the education assembly line. These bots would make better decisions and at a lower cost than does the current compulsive behavior of a comatose BOT.

Re Twitter: OberlinChaos.com has observed the tight ethical commonality between President Trump and Oberlin’s President Ambar. Both understand how to use Twitter effectively to pursue their similar PR objectives. OberlinChaos will reluctantly use Twitter in the future because if it is powerful enough and good enough for these two Presidents, it is good enough for OberlinChaos. Twitter is, at the least, not as ethically obnoxious as is Facebook.

Now you can say in all honesty, Nobody told me!
/s/ JD Nobody (No pronouns!), OC ’61.

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Posted Dec 23, 2019 at 14:00. Revised Apr 24, 2021 at 20:02.
Retrieved May 11, 2021 at 11:45.
Copyright ©2021 Charles E. Dial. All rights reserved.

Published
Categorized as History

By JD Nobody

JD Nobody, OC '61, has a 54-year career in developing software. This involved IT application design and maintenance, software engineering, bank operations, and article composing software for The Business Torts Reporter. He was an administrative officer and ICBM launch officer in the U.S. Air Force.

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